


If I Was Made To Love You

by WhiskeyKisses



Series: If I Was Made To Love You [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Domestic Violence, F/M, I believe I'll do a sequel, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Smut, implied non con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-10-24
Packaged: 2019-01-22 14:18:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12483580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiskeyKisses/pseuds/WhiskeyKisses
Summary: “You know I’m still not sure about that woman.”“What do you mean?”“Something just doesn’t sit right with me about her. She’s… It’s a vibe. And she has trouble written all over her.”Alec glad it wasn’t just him that felt that way and the Lightwood intuition was rarely wrong, so if his sister also had a bad feeling about this…





	If I Was Made To Love You

**Author's Note:**

> If anything, please listen to Dan Own's "Made To Love You" if you read this/whenever you can. It's beautiful and heart wrenching and the inspiration for this fic. Where the song was inspired from the singer's friend's story.  
> There is an allusion to non consensual sex, it is not graphic but it is there. So I warn you for that.  
> I also can't write grahic smut scenes with Magnus and Camille.  
> Malec is my endgame.  
>  
> 
> I hope this isn't terrible. It isn't beta read.

 

\--ooOoo--

“You know I’m still not sure about that woman.”

“What do you mean?”

“Something just doesn’t sit right with me about her. She’s… It’s a vibe. And she has trouble written all over her.”

Alec glad it wasn’t just him that felt that way and the Lightwood intuition was rarely wrong, so if his sister also had a bad feeling about this…

The pair observed said woman in question as she pawed at the front of her partner. A seemingly loving smile gracing her lips with a smitten look being returned, an arm loosely wrapped around her waist, open palm resting on her hip.

 Camille Belcourt… Oh where do you start with Miss Belcourt.

 

\--ooOoo--

 

“Come on, Babe! We’ll be late if you don’t hurry. There’s only so much you can do with that face of yours.”

Camille was never one to mince her words and there had to be a compliment in there somewhere… if you looked hard enough.

“Calm down, dear. I’m ready.”

Upon entering the living area Camille was immediately circling him, running her critical gaze over him, taking in his outfit and make up.

“I suppose it will do.” Breathing out quietly before smiling broadly, moving in to press a soft kiss to Magnus’ lips, hand moving up to cup his jaw, wiping away the faint trace of lipstick left behind with her thumb. 

“You look lovely.” And she did. Her dress was a deep burgundy, matching the burgundy of his velvet blazer, a simple short cut dress with a lace overlay. Laced sleeves that ran down the entirety of her arms to her wrists. Her hair was curled to frame her face, with make up deep and seductive, no one could say that Camille was someone to shy away from attention… nor was she innocent. She took what she wanted with greedy hands.

“Of course I do. Come on, we can’t be late, need to rub shoulders with the right people, Father will be so disappointed if we make a bad impression.”

The way she said ‘we’ made it perfectly clear that she meant _him._

“Don’t worry, Darling. Who can resist our charm?”

Magnus smiled at the other, a hand coming up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Who indeed.”

\--ooOoo--

 

The lawn was done up beautifully. Lights looped around the trees, along the hedging, around the pavilion giving the garden a romantic fairy tale feel. The sun was making its slow descent into early evening as the guests pottered around the grass, the air humming with energy and conversation.

You had to be considered an elite to be invited to such an event. People from old money, people with the new money, mostly if you just had money.

The Lightwoods were held in such a high regard that they were almost like royalty. Even with some distasteful things that darkened their past, it wasn’t enough to strip them of their reputation. The charitable family made sure to make up for said past and had come through the other side and were praised for coming out much stronger.

They were strong.

They were powerful.

There were _gorgeous._

It was unfair to have a family that were that attractive, that commanding, that unattainable. Magnus knew all about that.

Two of the Lightwoods currently perched themselves on white lawn chairs that had been dotted around for the guests to sit as they socialised. They were looking over the crowd as though they had everyone in the palm of their hand. Looking dressed to the nines, the oldest in a charcoal blazer paired with dark pants and a black shirt. No tie was present as the top few buttons had been undone to show off a slither of chest. Isabelle in a stunning red dress that fit her wonderfully, low neckline with the hem of the dress ending just above her knees. Her hair was pulled back into a messy half up do, sections at the front left loose to frame her face, eyes dark with lips as red as her dress. Alluring as ever.

“Oh, look who has arrived.”

The small smile on his sister’s lips made his stomach swoop slightly, there was only one person she could be referring to with a look like that.

Turning slightly to be able to look in her line of vision, Alec felt his breath hitch slightly for there stepping through the patio doors leading to the party was Magnus Bane and Camille Belcourt, arms looped together.

Magnus looked as handsome as ever. The blazer fit his form wonderfully, pants perfectly tailored to show off his legs and Alec was sure they would frame his ass amazingly as well. Alec found himself hoping he would have Magnus walking away from him soon so he could look. Inconspicuously, of course.

The other wasn’t one for ties, so his shirt was unbuttoned, like Alec, but a lot further down, signature necklaces adorning his neck and chest. Not that Alec minded Magnus in a tie… In fact, he was all for a tie. Ties had their other uses…

Magnus’ hair was done up perfectly as always, with makeup that just accentuated how beautiful the other man was. Alec could see that he had grown out some of his facial hair and Alec felt himself groan internally, he loves it when Magnus would do that. Loved the feeling of it between his thighs…

 

\--ooOoo--

 

_Giggling. So much giggling._

_The soft morning light poured in through the large windows that spanned from the floor to the ceiling. Obscured only slightly by a half-closed curtain that let in more light rather than block it due to the thin material._

_Thumbs brushed over soft cheeks, eyes fluttering closed from the gentle touches. Hands gripping a waist to pull the other body closer, pressing up against each other firmly before rolling over, lips finding each other._

_Quiet gasps._

_Groans._

\--ooOoo--

 

"Earth to Alec. Come in, Alec.”

Blinking for a few moments before Alec focused his gaze on Isabelle, the knowing smirk on her face told him she knew what he was daydreaming about.

“Welcome back. They’re making their way over now.”

Standing up, she smoothed down her dress to greet the couple approaching, accepting a glass that was offered to her by a passing waiter. The few seconds of Izzy speaking allowed Alec to recollect himself before standing also to join the conversation. Shaking hands with Magnus no matter how foreign it felt to do so and accepting the cheek kisses from Camille, even if the touch felt ugly and caused his skin to crawl. Appearances had to be upheld. No matter how close you are or in Camille's case, how not close you are, you still must follow protocol.

“Glad you could make it.”

“Oh, the pleasure is all ours, can never miss a Lightwood gathering, now can we?”

Camille’s smile was sharp, something about it made Alec feel uneasy, people like Camille… You had to be prepared for anything. She came from old money and someone you never wanted to cross. She was as lethal as she was gorgeous. Definitely someone you wanted on your side.

“I think I saw Mother and Father over on the other side of that crowd, I’ll be back in a few minutes, you’ll stay here won’t you, Babe?”

“Of course.” Replying with a nod, Magnus accepted the kiss from his girlfriend before she disappeared off to find her family.

Looking back at the siblings who were watching him carefully Magnus smiled at them.

“You look absolutely ravishing as always.”

It was unclear as to who he was directing that to. Most would assume it was towards Isabelle but the look in Magnus’ eyes and the light flush decoration Alec’s cheekbones spoke differently.

Giggling softly, Isabelle hugged Magnus. Knowing exactly who he was talking about.

“It’s good to see you.”

Protocol be damned.

“The same to you also. It’s been some time.”

“It really has, you have to stop being a stranger.”

Swallowing, Magnus spared a glance in the direction that Camille had left in before getting caught in Alec’s gaze. Losing himself momentarily before replying.

“Of course, we should arrange a get together soon.” A few beats of silence passed by as Magnus took a sip of his drink. “So Alec, how is life of the law treating you?”

Scratching the back of his head with a soft nervous smile that was only reserved for the closest people, “Ah… I dropped that. In fact, I’m hosting an exhibition soon, on the East side. You should come if you get the chance to.”

“I see you’re following your heart for once.”

“Yeah, someone gave me the best advice for that and I’m grateful.”

The pair fell into an easy conversation that they hadn’t noticed that the third member of the group had disappeared.

 --ooOoo--

 

_Laughing, Magnus lifted a hand to cover the lens of the camera, gently pushing away._

_"Must you take photos of me eating? That is hardly flattering.”_

_A scoff._

_"Oh please, you know you always look perfect.”_

_Alec’s bluntness always caused Magnus’ insides to squirm. The compliments always easily rolled off his tongue without realising. Whilst Magnus could wax words of poetry, Alec spoke his mind. Got easily flustered when he thought too hard about it but in moments like this, he didn’t realise how good with words he could be._

_“You always say the nicest things.”_

_Turning his head to smile at the other, a click happening before he knew it._

_-_ -ooOoo-- 

“Magnus!”

With that the bubble was broken, turning his head in the direction of the call of his name, he saw Camille making her way to him.

“Come on, Father wants to speak to you.”

Hand curling around his own to tug him away from Alec, false remorse showing on her face.

“Sorry to cut this short but I need to steal my boyfriend away.”

Waving a hand slightly with a returning false smile, Alec let the two go.

“No worries, see you two later.”

Moving away to look for his sister or even brother for that matter. The last time he saw said brother he was talking to Clary, probably attempting to get back together. As he turned his head, he missed the brief but longing look Magnus had sent his way, allowing himself to be pulled away by his girlfriend, ready to get grilled by her father. Something he would never be prepared for.

\--ooOoo--

 

It was exhausting playing nice with Mr. Belcourt. That man was always questioning him, and each conversation always felt like he was swimming with sharks. One wrong move or wrong answer and he would be torn apart. He could see where Camille got it from. The Belcourts were not a family you messed with.

His arm wrapped around Camille’s waist, hand on her hip was meant to ground him, the presence of her meant to comfort him but he still felt at a loose end even with her this close. She didn’t settle his racing heart, if anything she made him feel like he was on a razor edge and he was close to slipping.

“How is work going?”

“It’s going wonderfully. I’m getting jobs booked regularly and by some very high-class magazines.”

“And who would have guessed that this face would be such a big seller.”

Chin caught between a finger and thumb, shaking it slightly as Camille smiled at him before looking back at her father. That hurt. Anyone else it would have seemed teasing but from her… it hurt.

Humming quietly, Mr Belcourt nodded before speaking. “Well, nothing but the best for our Camille. It’s good to see that you are making a name for yourself. Let’s hope it isn’t a short-term success.”

Magnus could never understand why this family had to be so cutting with everything. He just wanted to be happy and enjoy his job without comments like that.

“Of course, it won’t be. I’m good at what I do.”

Mr Belcourt nodded before turning to talk to his wife and daughter about one thing or another, which he tuned out of. Just making the correct noise here and there, not paying attention to the same boring conversation, the same praise for the prestigious model next to him. Magnus tended to get overshadowed by Camille, them both being in the same industry and all.

Letting his attention wander over the crowded lawn once again, Magnus found his gaze drift over to Alec once again who was laughing at something Jace had said before catching Magnus. Alec’s lips quirked up on one side in that semi smile he did, the smile that caused butterflies to move inside of him.

\--ooOoo--

 

_"Come on, pose for me.”_

_"Stop it, Alexander. This is silly.”_

_"_ _It is not silly. You know you have talent and that face will sell just about anything. I love that face and I won’t be the only one that does.”_

_“Just the one that matters.”_

_The strap of the camera hanging low in front of him after neglecting to put it over his head, Alec had been snapping photos of him whenever he got the chance. Said strap drew Magnus’ gaze down to the bare chest of the other, the taller having only pulled on a pair of sweatpants, no underwear that was painfully obvious to anyone who looked. Magnus praised whatever higher being there was for sweatpants sometimes._

_Another click._

_“Whatever you’re thinking about, keep thinking that. I enjoy that look quite a lot. Especially if I’m causing it.”_

_Rolling his eyes, Magnus laughed as he threw a tshirt at the other, trying to block off the camera that Alec had pointed at him._

_“Put that on, you heathen.”_

_“But why? You love my chest.” Pulling the camera away to look at what he had just taken. “I even have photographic evidence…” the smirk that tugged Alec’s lips caused Magnus’ breath to hitch, “… well, **if** it’s just my chest your thinking about…” _

_“Shut up.”_

_“Oh no, I don’t think I’ll be shutting up.”_

_Another click of the camera sounded as Magnus made his way around the bed, pulling the camera from his hands, dropping it down onto the bed carefully, he knew that it was Alec’s baby. Hands free to come up and grip Alec’s cheeks, dragging him close, lips firmly moving against his._

_“Okay, shutting up.”_

_“Idiot.”_

\--ooOoo--  

 

Alec felt a tug at his heart when he held Magnus’ gaze. There was something tired there, something he couldn’t put his finger on it but he knew it wasn’t happiness. The man, even so wonderfully dressed and made up, seemed dim, subdued. Something was not right. Even that smile that was plastered on his face as he turned back to the Belcourts and friends, perking up some with a grand gesture, face becoming more animated as he repeated some story from work that had the women tittering behind their hands. Camille looking up at him with something akin to an adoring look.

It made Alec feel nauseous.

“You’re staring again, Alec.”

Shaking himself out of his Magnus influenced stupor, Alec pulled all his focus onto Jace, trying to ignore the man not too far but felt like a lifetime away. Ignoring how familiar those words sounded…

“No I’m not. Shut up.”

“Mature.”

“Don’t you start.” Frowning at Clary before looking back at Jace.

“Hey, don’t take it out on her just because you and Magnus had some kind of disagreement.”

“We didn’t have a disagreement.”

“Yeah, whatever. Whatever you had then. It’s not her fault.”

Sighing, Alec nodded. “Yeah, I know, I’m sorry. It’s just hard. I never expected this to happen.”

“No one did, I don’t think even Magnus did. It was a surprise to everyone. I don’t like it… Something is strange.”

Great. Now Clary had picked on something, if everyone was having this feeling, Alec didn’t want to think about what may have been coming.

Slinging his arm over her shoulder, Jace kissed her temple before pulling her into his side. The pair of them suited each other fairly well. Alec could tell how much the two cared for each other and he just hoped to everything that the two of them would work everything out, wouldn’t lose the chance of happiness that it looked like he had. He had let Magnus go and now a Belcourt had him in their grasp. He just hoped they treated him with the respect and gave him the love he deserved.

Letting out another sigh he followed the group towards his parents who were preparing to make a speech. Standing with the rest of his family, arms behind his back one hand clutching the other’s wrist, a habit he had been unable to break out of. Eyes were flitting over the crowd, memorising faces for future reference, recognising the majority and learning the new. He passed over Magnus quickly, not wanting to get caught staring, he doesn’t think he could breathe if he looked at him for too long right now.

\--ooOoo--

 

_“You’re staring again, Alexander…”_

_Smiling softly, Alec let his fingers stroke over Magnus’ cheek. They had found their way to the couch during some… rigorous activities, Magnus resting on top of the other, Alec’s legs hanging partly off the arm rest due to how tall he was. Naked bodies entwined with each other, lightweight blanket covering them._

_“I can’t help it. You’re beautiful.”_

_Magnus couldn’t stop the loving smile that his lips twitched into, eyes looking up to stare into the others. Shifting himself so he could look at his Lover properly. So close he could make out all the different shades in those hazel eyes before him._

_“And you’re angelic.”_

_Alec couldn’t help but roll his eyes before moaning quietly as he shifted a little. Unable to hold it back when he felt all of Magnus’ naked skin against his, not fully satiated from previous activities, which Magnus caught onto._

_“Angelic but absolutely sinful.” Magnus let out a shaky breath._

_“You forget about fallen angels, Babe.”_

_Chuckling at Alec’s response, Magnus moved so he could pull Alec up into a seated position, arm curling around his neck as he moved in for a kiss. Swinging a leg over to straddle the other man’s thighs, rocking his body forward, both groaning at the sensation._

_Hands clutched at Magnus’ hips before one slid ‘round to grip his ass, squeezing as he did drawing a gasp from his Lover. Guiding him into a gentle rocking motion, mouth distracting Magnus before the hand that gripped his hip moved to his own mouth, sucking on them as he stared up at Magnus. Tongue curling around them provocatively before Magnus pulled at his wrist, taking over with his own mouth. Groaning and moving his head as though he was imagining it to be Alec’s cock, dragging a groan from the taller, pulling his hand away to thrust them up into Magnus’ entrance._

_Magnus was still stretched from earlier, but Alec knew that Magnus just loved the feeling and he took any opportunity he got to do it. Curling them just right, searching for that gland that would make him lose control._

_And just like that, Alec found it with ease. Magnus flailing with a loud moan, back arching as he moved his hips._

_“Yes… Baby…”_

_Eyes clenched shut as Alec abused that spot a few more times before he had enough. Pulling that hand from him, Magnus moved himself to pressed Alec’s cock to his entrance, sinking down quickly, both letting out twin sounds of pleasure. The feeling that had grown between them was something that they had never felt before. Never would feel with anyone else._

_“Alexander…”_

_“Yes… Magnus, that’s it. Move yourself. Take it… Fuck, you’re beautiful.”_

\--ooOoo--

 

“You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

Magnus was confused, he let his shoulders droop slightly as he prepared for the argument that was sure to follow. He didn’t know what he was being accused of this time as he stepped into Camille’s apartment behind her. They had an enjoyable evening. He had schmoozed with her family friends, had charmed her mother, been grilled and survived her father. All in all, he thought he behaved quite well. Everyone had been entertained by him. He barely saw the Lightwood family but that had become common place nowadays.

“Whatever do you mean, Darling?”

“Don’t you ‘Darling’ me.”

Frowning slightly, Magnus took her coat to hang up, his blazer following suit.

“I’m confused right now, what is it that I have meant to of done?”

“Alec Lightwood. You were practically drooling over him all night!”

Magnus felt like he was choking slightly and he wasn’t even wearing a damned tie. He didn’t think he had been that bad or obvious.

“Whatever do you mean?”

“Don’t you dare.” Spinning around, Camille levelled him with a glare, stepping forward, almost in his personal space. “Don’t you dare insult my intelligence. You may have fooled everyone else but you can’t fool me.”

“I’m not, my dear. There’s nothing between me and Alec. We’re just friends. I don’t even see him or the family all that much.” Magnus tried to wrap his arms around the other, pulling her to his body, trying to give her reassurance.

“Of course there is nothing between you two. He wouldn’t have you even if we weren’t together.”

Oh… Ouch. She knew where to stick the pins. She continued as if she hadn’t felt him wince.

“You know you don’t mean anything to him. That little fling you had was done before it even started. I’m the only one that can give you what you need.”

Smiling softly at him, a contradiction to her words, Magnus tried not to frown when she pulled him into a soft kiss.

“I’m the only one who knows what you need.”

The kiss turned heavier but Magnus couldn’t connect himself at all. He felt himself falling and it was like he couldn’t control his movements. Something else took over as the two moved together. Stumbling to her bedroom. Stumbling into her bed.

Harsh words followed. Loving touches burned.

It was pain, it was taking what she wanted.

He couldn’t breathe.

\--ooOoo--

After, with Camille curled up against his chest, fingers tracing over his abs in a distracted motion she let out a hum.

“You know you’re gorgeous, right?”

Magnus shifted a little from the compliment, not too sure what to do with it but smiled nonetheless.

“Thank you…”

“I only have the best.”

Smiling at him, she lifted her head to gently kiss him, Magnus felt his heart swell once more, letting himself relax into the kiss. Fingers moving to stroke through her hair, caressing her neck as they settled down to sleep.

“Hmm... I love you, Baby.”

\--ooOoo--

 

“ _Yes… Fuck, baby. God, you feel amazing.”_

_Magnus tried to smirk but got cut off with a well aimed thrust to his prostate, causing his eyes to roll back into his head, a shudder moving through his spine as a whine ripped itself from his throat._

_Falling forward, Magnus moaned and panted into Alec’s ear, nails digging into his shoulder as he tried to keep himself together._

_“Stop it, let yourself go, let me see you.”_

_No one would believe him if he said Alec had a talent for dirty talking. People forget that the shy teenager had grown into a confident man. Who wasn’t ashamed to go for what he wanted and take. Sometimes he stole the breath from Magnus and he would gladly give it to him if he was asked._

_“I want to see you fall apart on my cock, Magnus. Ah… Fuck you until you can’t see clearly. Lose it to the point you don’t remember your na-ame… hn…”_

_Moving harder, Magnus could feel himself clenching more, unravelling quickly._

_“A-Alexander… Harder…” Rolling his hips, Magnus shifted so his knees spread wider, feeling how Alec pushed up to thrust into him, sweat rolling down his neck from exertion. Leaning forward, Malec dragged his tongue up his Lover’s neck, biting here and there before letting out a loud moan, which seemed to be Alec’s undoing. In a movement that the older couldn't comprehend at that moment, Alec had him pressed down on his back on the couch, arm gripping his thigh to pull it close to his chest, Magnus’ other leg wrapped around his waist as he knelt with his other leg firmly planted on the ground before entering Magnus again._

_Hips finding his quick pace again, managing to thrust harder and faster, Magnus couldn’t keep up anymore, could only take it as his back arched. Pleasure flooding his senses as he lost control of his mouth. Whimpering and moaning that only fuelled Alec on._

_“A-ah!”_

_“I love you… Oh fuck, I love you…”_

\--ooOoo-- 

“Morning, Baby.”

Smiling, Camille had wrapped herself up in one of his silk robes that he had left at her place one time and boy was she beautiful. Magnus could feel what had brought them together, if only he could forget how harsh she could cut him.

She was make up free and looked as beautiful without it as she did with. Hair piled up on top of her head and it was quite obvious that she wore nothing besides that robe that ended just above her knee.

“Well it’s good morning indeed.” Making a show of looking at her, moving to grasp her hand, spinning her slowly before pulling her to his chest with a smile. Dipping his head to kiss her gently before pulling away to sit at the breakfast bar. Sipping at his coffee once again. It was times like these he remembered how everything wasn’t all bad.

That maybe things could be better.

Maybe things would get better. 

Maybe maybes would always be that. A maybe.

\--ooOoo--

 

It was a few months after the Lightwood party…

“You’re pathetic, you know that?”

Frowning, Magnus turned his head to look at his girlfriend.

“I’m pathetic? Where did that come from?”

He couldn’t remember doing anything wrong. He was merely sipping his wine watching TV peacefully. That was until Camille came barrelling in shouting nonsense. Shifting to turn off the TV he moved to stand up.

It was obvious that she may have had a bit to drink so he couldn’t exactly take anything that she does now seriously. Placing his glass down he moved over to Camille, hands out to steady her, which of course she slapped away.

“Don’t you dare touch me!”

“Camille, honey, what’s wrong? What’s happened?”

“You! You’re what’s happened! You!”

He thought they were fine. Things had been good. Sure, a snide comment here and there but nothing he couldn’t handle. This, this was new.

An open hand met his jaw. The noise echoed through the apartment, even more so with the TV turned off.

The silence stretched between them. Both staring at each other as Magnus’ hand came up to rest on his cheek, unable to process what just happened.

Camille looked shocked. Like she couldn’t believe what just happened.

“Oh my god… Baby, I’m so sorry.” She hesitated in her haste to get to him. Tears welling up as she fussed over him, muttering apologies as she fretted. Pulling him to her in a hug, his arms slowly coming up to wrap around her.

“I’m sorry, don’t hate me. Please forgive me.”

Unable to do anything but nod, he held her tight. Whether he was seeking comfort from Camille or trying to comfort her, he didn’t know…

 

 

 _I never thought it could be_  
_And there was nothing that could make me let you go_  
_Cause you were my wildest dream_  
_But your open hands become my enemy_

_Dan Owen - Made To Love You_

**Author's Note:**

> arrowsandwhiskeykisses over on tumblr.  
> Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated.


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